Oh joy of joys, my step-sister Gretchen is coming to stay with us next Monday, and she's bringing her two spoiled brat children along with her. I would rather spend the three days of her visit getting systematically tortured, Medieval-Catholic style, than spend time with Gretchen.
So just to give y'all an idea of how bad she is, here's some highlights from her last few visits down from Boston:
- Within 2 hours of her and her children's arrival, the remote control for our brand new flat screen tv vanished forever. That was 2 years ago. We never found the remote.
- She chain smoked whilst pregnant with the 1st child, right after her father was diagnosed with emphysema. And then when Gretchen's idiot husband caught me smoking a while later, he gives me this long-winded lecture on smoking, and how the hell can I smoke in front of step-dad when he's got emphysema, etc., etc., etc. ARE YOU F*CKING KIDDING? I couldn't come right out and tell hubbie that Gretchen was smoking while preggers, as I would have been burned at the stake. So instead I just made a snide comment about "at least I'm not smoking for two."
- last time she came to visit, I got too drunk when we all went out to dinner as a happy family. She asked if I wanted to stay at the bar after our parents left, and I was like "totally!" BIG mistake. At the time, I was unemployed and completely broke. She's an editor at Marie Claire. And yet when it came time to pay the tab, and later to pay the taxi, she was like "oh sorry, I don't have any money on me; can you pay?"
Bitch.
Omg I really hate her... :**(
Ugh, that doesn't not sound like it will be a lovely visit. Hope it goes as smoothly as possible for you! <3
ReplyDeleteI would still wanna know wtf happened to that remote. Did the little fckers eat it?!
ReplyDeleteWhat a.. Agh! I hope you survive those three days without killing her!
ReplyDeleteShe really sounds like a f****** bitch. I hope you survive those days.
ReplyDelete♥
You can definitely survive her because you're stronger than her. Just try not to bury her in the backyard - as tempting as that would be. I hope her visit goes by lightning fast. :(
ReplyDeleteThanks, guys. I just have to remember that if there's no body, there's no crime.
ReplyDelete:)