Really?

I actually didn't have a food dream last night, which has been the norm lately. Instead I had a graphic sex dream with Triple H:

Major yummies!!!! :D

.............................................

For a while I thought Mum was just turning a blind eye to my eating habits, but after this morning, I'm not so sure. I have to be super-stealth on Thursdays for breakfast, as it's Mum's day off work and she likes hovering around the kitchen while I'm trying to eat my cereal and make my tea, and she likes talking at me a hundred words per minute when I'm not properly awake yet and then she gets pissed off that I cannot provide anything more than the odd grunt or "yes." She makes me think of those muppets on Sesame Street that couldn't talk, just "yipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyip...."

These things:

Anywho, Mum was never bothered by the fact that I keep a measuring cup in the box of Corn Flakes so I can have exactly 1 serving for breakfast (140 cals). I do, however, think she would have an issue with what I've been doing for the last month or so - shaving quite a bit off the top of the 1 cup of cereal and then adding just a tiny splash of skim milk and a lot of water (makes it about 90 cals, or less depending on my mood). Herein lies the reason I must be stealth on Thursdays.

So later on, when I was making my coffee, she caught me pouring exactly 1/2 tbsp (5) of fat free half & half into the coffee and goes, "OCD much?"

I was like, "..... huh?"

And then I realized: maybe she isn't turning a blind eye to my ED; maybe she really thinks my OCD has just gotten that much worse.

Of course, she could just be in denial, but Mum's not prone to denial. She has more a blunt-force-trauma-to-the-head attitude on life and any issues she might face on a day to day basis. Denial takes some hard work and imagination, and she is not comfortable with either.

Mum has never said anything about me cutting up my dinner into tiny pieces all exactly the same size, or my measuring of pretty much everything. I guess those behaviors could look like OCD, especially when coming from someone who already has mild OCD. I shall have to pursue this notion further and gauge her reactions.

So far today, I ate: cereal (80); coffee (5). Have to go out to dinner tonight, as it's the little sis's last night in the US before her trip to Costa Rica (bitch), so I must conserve.