Friday, August 13, 2010

Friday the 13th...


As the unluckiest person on planet earth (ok, I know that's stretching it just a bit, but humour me), I am somewhat frightened of leaving the house today. In all likelihood, I will get struck by lightning, or hit by a stray meteor from that shower last night, or crash my car into McDonald's and somehow absorb 100,000 calories through osmosis and come out of the crash weighing 6,000 lbs.

This absolutely must not happen, because I finally bought a dress for my friend's wedding. The wedding is in October, so between now and then, I must not consume anything. At all.
The dress:


Delicious, no? 'Tis jersey knit cheapo fabric, but looks nice - slate grey wiggle dress with lace trim at the top. I found it in Express. I think I look pretty darn good in it, aside from the fact that it leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination. I just wish my arms would look as slim as the rest of me. >:( Now I need to find a perfect pair of shoes to match. And Operation Find Bellatrix A Suitable Wedding Date is in full swing. I was texting back and forth with one of my gay gentleman friends last night. He's nototrious for sending 12 texts for every 1 of mine, but when I casually asked him to accompany me to the wedding, he stopped all communication.

I'll take that as a "NO."

First day of eating after the Master Cleanse, and I started out so good! Had cereal for breakfast (80), went out for a lovely 45 minute powerwalk in the rain (I love the rain), and then went shopping (which hopefully burned some calories, as well as the giant gaping hole in my wallet). I had an iced coffee from Dunkin Donuts. Yassar, God bless him, knows I have issues and does not complain when I ask him to put EXACTLY 1 and 1/2 tablespoons of half & half into my coffee (40). That was all I had until dinner.

And then I went out to dinner with Mum. I did ok - two glasses of wine (300ish? I don't get too worked up about liquid cals.) and they had broiled catfish as one of the specials. MEGA YUMMIES!!! And only like 120 calories per 8 oz. I had that, and nibbled the cajun-spiced zucchini that came with it.

Then I got home and had ice cream. And peanut butter melted in the microwave.

It really wasn't that bad - I measured both, so the whole dessert was around 250 cals. But I was quite drunk, as it doesn't take much alcohol for me to get wasted. So too much alcohol + spicy fish + DAIRY = me curled into a ball and writhing around the floor until 3 AM. Bleh.

Idk when I became lactose intolerant, but it sucks.

9 comments:

  1. it's not bad at all
    and girl you look SMOKING in the dress srsly your so hot :D !! :D

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  2. Yeah, my lactose intolerance snuck up on me about a year ago. I have no idea how or why... but it suddenly no longer agrees with me. I still eat it though, because it's yummy. xD

    You will not absorb calories through osmosis, so shush. :P

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  3. hello :)
    Thank you for your comments - sadly many of my half-written childhood epics either died a death with the old computer, or are stored somewhere on those weird things called floppy discs. Convenient for my CD and USB only laptop... The Cinderella story still exists in paper format.. There was one story I wrote in primary 4 that I was contemplating scanning and posting (when I find it again). It's a delightful true story tale about a dead bird that I found, illustrated. I promise you I'm a nice person really.
    I understand your pen trauma. It's good to know I'm not the only one... it's important stuff, the right pen. Somewhat like finding the correct spouse...
    I didn't realise it was friday 13th, I may not have gone out if I knew. Though, I can now inform you from my direct experience that the likelihood of accidental osmosis is slim to nil.
    You look lovely in that dress by the way, all of you, despite what you may think of your arms.

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  4. ok i love the dress im acutally in love with it and u look great u will def find hot shoes to match it and a hot date
    oo dairy is evil as u know its kills my stomach and my chest so yeah we shoudl both stop eating it
    but u did great eating

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  5. You are so funny! And look amazing in that dress.. Sorry about your friend.. maybe he dropped his phone in the toilet from excitement? Seems like people drop their phones in toilets a lot.. Anyway, how did the master cleanse go for you overall? I mean, now that you are done with it, what are your thoughts?

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  6. LMFAO @ the Osmosis! I love that!

    Dress + you = gorgeous

    Good luck finding a date! =]

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  7. That dress is seriously hot!! <3

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  8. You look absolutely stunning darling! :-)

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