[ ...Or, some habits other people have started to notice.]
- The Face-Fat-Check: Uncountable times a day, I will check the spot just under my chin to make sure I don't have a double chin, and to see how fat it is in general. Most often, I will do this immediately before eating. If it's too fat or wobbly, I will skip the food.
- I carry a teaspoon and tablespoon measure around in my purse.
- I keep Emergency Food in my purse (usually cereal bars or something similar, in a plastic baggie) for when I go long stretches of time without food. Should I be out and about and start to feel faint, I'll take a tiny bite of one of the cereal bars.
- I have a permanent limp that's difficult to cover up in flat shoes, as a result of a damaged Achilles tendon (doesn't hurt in high heels). This is what happens when you exercise on pain killers, and refuse to stop exercising even though you're injured.
- I keep a 1/2 cup measuring cup in my box of Corn Flakes, and will get extremely irritable if someone takes it out and puts it away.
- I have a "compost heap" outside (for gardening - duh), where a lot of my dinner ends up when no one's looking. I hate wasting food, so this seems like a sensible solution, as I know for a fact that both the deer and the neighborhood foxes eat from the heap, and mum thinks I actually use it for the garden.
- I am constantly feeling myself up, and have to be careful not to do it in public. Sometimes, I am seized with the horrific reality that I'm an elephant, and must then squeeze my ass, love handles, thighs, stomach, and arm fat to assess just how fat I am.
- I eat raw veggies (usually carrot sticks and celery) with ketchup.
- I will sometimes eat a small spoonful of spicy English mustard, followed with a giant glass of water.
- I keep a baggie of Cheerios in my desk at work (exactly one cup), and it usually takes me at least 2 weeks to eat the entire cup full.
- I also keep several boxes of Sudafed in my desk.
- I pretend to be taking baths and instead, do aerobics on the bathroom floor for an hour.
- I eat small spoonfuls of salt right out of the Morton package.
- There is a definitely difference in the taste of different brands of water. I refuse to touch Aquafina and Dasani, as they're just nasty, and no water bottle should hiss when you open it. Evian is pretty yummy. Poland Spring tastes funny. None of the store brand waters are worth your money, except for Stop & Shop. The tap water in my grandmother's house in Achill, Ireland is by far the best tasting water ever, followed closely by Fiji, and the tap water in my house. I wouldn't drink Philadelphia tap water if you paid me.
But in general, I think I'm probably pretty normal.
I thought I was the only psycho who had a "compost heap"! :D
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