People incapable of guilt usually do have a good time.

Several years ago, it was customary in my group of friends to throw a surprise party whenever it was someone's birthday. (Something that always perplexed me, since everyone would then know for certain that their birthday would result in a surprise party, thus rendering said party not much of a surprise.)

My bff M's personality is such that when he gets it in his head to do something, or when he is annoyed about something, absolutely nothing can stop him from being as contrary as humanly possible.*

On his birthday this one year, for whatever reason, M felt like being extra contrary.

As I was his BFF, our friends decided it was my job to make sure he arrived at his sister's house at a certain time for his surprise party. M. and I hung out during the day, and then when evening came, I suggested we head over to his sister's place to meet up with a few other peeps and decide where to go for dinner.

M decided no, he did not like that plan, and instead he wanted to just go straight to Pizza Hut for dinner without anyone else. Since M was the one driving, I could do nothing but sit in the passenger seat and grow increasingly anxious about the fact that we would not be arriving at his sister's house when we were supposed to so everyone could surprise him for his birthday party.**

He knew that a surprise party awaited him. I tried. I really tried. I never said a word about it, but he knew. Five minutes after we were supposed to have been at his sister's house, she called him. He answered, and from what I gathered she told him he should come over so we could all go out to dinner together, but M. wasn't having any of it.

Then his sister's BFF called me and told me off for ruining everything, at which point I said you know there's really nothing I can do--M is driving.

We eventually met up with everyone else at his sister's house later on, although by then they were all less than enthusiastic about celebrating M.'s birthday. M. later admitted to me that he purposely did all of that to piss everyone off. For no reason other than he felt like it.

In other, sadder news, Rik Mayall has died. I'm very upset.

*Side story: I had a dream once that my friends and I went antique shop hopping out in the country somewhere, and all of a sudden the world turned apocalyptic. The apocalypse was headed straight for us (zombies, planes with bombs, etc.), and we all panicked and were like we need to run somewhere safe LIKE NOW. But M was admiring something in the antique shop, and could not be persuaded to leave. Like for reals, planes were bombing everything around us and we were all like WE NEED TO GET IN THE CAR AND FLOOR IT OUTTA HERE ASAP, but M would not abandon his shopping. This sums up his personality far better than any other description I could possibly give.

**In New Jersey, back when I was in high school, we took drivers' ed sophomore year and if you passed the written test at the end, you got your driving permit. I did not get my permit until several months after I turned 17 (my senior year) because I failed the written test twice. As a result, M was usually the one driving when we hung out. And as a result of his nature, I was late home 9 times out of 10 and would thus be grounded for the next month.