This dance will hurt like hell.

My boss settled a personal injury case recently, to the tune of about $55,000.00. The settlement check from Geico finally arrived last Thursday. With these kinds of legal settlements, the check that comes in is always made payable to the law firm and to the client, which means it needs to be signed by both the law firm and the client in order to get deposited into the attorney trust account. Our client lives in central New Jersey, roughly 1 1/2 hours away, so we can hardly just ask him to pop down to the office for 5 minutes to sign the check. Far easier to just have us declared Power of Attorney for him, and thus sign the check for him.

Now one would think that having been an attorney for quite some time, the Boss would be prepared for this sort of thing. Like, say, having our client sign a Power of Attorney immediately after we win the case so that we wouldn't need the client's signature on the settlement check. But no.

So we got the check on Thursday and I called our client and told him, and then I faxed him the Power of Attorney so that he could sign it and mail it back, figuring we'd have the signed form back by today (Monday), so we could then deposit the check. Client faxed it back just to let me know he got it and that he had put it in the mail.

But the Boss wanted his money NOW. He says just stamp the check and then sign as Power of Attorney for client, and take it to the bank. Ask for the manager--she knows us; she'll deposit it. I felt rather dubious about this plan, I but said ok and went to the bank.

Surprise, surprise--the bank manager (who made a spectacle of me in the middle of the bank, declaiming the absolute perfection of my skin) said they could not deposit the check without seeing the original signed and notarized Power of Attorney. I made her call the Boss to tell him this over the phone, because I wanted to make sure he got angry at her rather than at me. And then I went back to the office.

The Boss called literally 30 seconds after I got back, and he was not a happy camper whatsoever. So he says grab a new blank Power of Attorney and copy Client's signature from the fax onto the new one. Then notarize it.

-_-

I flat out refused. I know he's my boss, but he does not pay nearly enough for me to go around doing extremely illegal things like forging signatures and misusing my responsibilities as a notary. He can whine and yell all he wants. I am not doing it. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~**~*
I really hope that whomsoever invented cookies is currently burning in the deepest blackest pit of Hell. (It was someone in Persia in the 7th century.) Cookies are like cereal for me--once I start, I just can't stop.

Little Sis made these Nutella chocolate chip cookies yesterday. 

She effed up the first batch, and thus enlisted my help to try again. I made her more or less bow down and kiss my feet and admit that I was correct in my criticisms of the first batch (she cooked them too long) before I would help her. We made more, cooked them for the amount of time I specified, and they came out perfect.

I had been doing so well all weekend. No bingeing; not even a little. But those Nutella cookies pushed me over the edge.

I'm just no match for all the delicious things that were in the house after Mum and Little Sis went food shopping. (We all know what happens when Little Sis goes to the supermarket.) So yesterday, I ate:
- a whole box of Tastykake oatmeal sandwich cookies (Philip J. Baur and Herbert T. Morris better be burning in hell with the Persian Cookie-Maker) 

- 4 Cocoa Pebbles treats 

Someone in the cereal industry wants me dead; I'm fairly certain of this.
- 4 South Beach fiber bars
- 1/2 tub of hummus, with bread and crackers
- 2 ice cream sandwiches
- 1 mini tub cookies and cream ice cream
- 4 GIANT bowls of Honey Nut Cheerios, with milk
- Unknown number of Nutella cookies (10,000+?)
- 2 breasts of a roasted chicken
- 4 roast potatoes with butter
- more cookies
- more cereal
- more ice cream

The only saving grace was the 2 hours I spent on the treadmill and the Total Gym, which burned off about 1,000 calories. There was a Law & Order SVU marathon on the telly, which kept me occupied.

Today, I am fasting. I have had my coffee (40 cals of half & half) so far. I'm not eating again until my stomach deflates.

We smoke while we flip the bird.

300 followers?!? WORD. 


Hey y'all! How are things? 300 seems like a lot. Am I living up to everyone's expectations? Is there anything you'd like more of? Less of? Will I listen to suggestions? Probably not, but sure it's worth a try.


I kicked the elliptical's arse today at the gym. 600 calories in an hour. Then another 100ish on the bike. I'm reading Hunger Games. That book is BRILLIANT. Like seriously. Go read it. Now. 


It reminds me a bit of the film Battle Royale (if you haven't seen it, go rent it--I don't think it's banned anymore). I wish they'd done that when I was in grade school--rounded all us kiddies up, sent us to an island, and told us we had to kill each other until there was only one left. I would have won (obvs) and it would have been the mother of all bloodbaths.

Grade school sucked a lot.


I did not binge yesterday!! And haven't yet today (keeping fingers crossed that it lasts... I'm going to the pub tonight, so I'll allow myself semi-normal cal intake so I don't go nuts when I come home drunk). 


I should be working on some kind of fiction project for my writing workshop. 'Tis my turn to email everyone up to 8 pages of a first draft, but all the stuff I'm working on is either part of a series and already 2 or 3 books in, or it's crap and I don't feel like wasting my time typing it when I shall most likely abandon it anyway. 


So I'm procrastinating. I showered. Did my hair up all nice.

...Not really. It's in a more contained sort of bun now, like in that post I did about my unhygienic hair rituals. 


I also tidied my room. Did all the grocery shopping. Picked up Mum's prescription. And I attempted to tidy my closet, but gave up.


You have to love the closets and cupboards in my house. Mum is a minimalist, and I am a hoarder, so in order to balance the two, Mum is ok with stuffing things out of sight (and thus out of mind) so the house can look bare and sterile. So we stuff many, many things into closets.

This is all well and good until you actually have to go and get something out of the closet.

There's usually an avalanche, complete with at least 2 spiders.


But worse than the avalanche, I think, is when you get attacked by just one heavy item.

I am being unfair. These things generally only happen after I have been putting things away in the closets. The cupboard under my sink is my fav. 


...


Ok, I really need to go write something. I have until Monday evening to send it out. Deadlines and I do not get along very well. 


Hope everyone's having a spectacular weekend! <3