Have a biscuit, Potter.

A short update, because that last post was kind of dramatic. 


I'm having a rough start this Monday. The time change didn't make much of a difference to my morning, because even though I was tired and even though I took my normal dose of sleepies last night, I did not get any sleep. At all. 


My step-siblings are here. All three of them. Grendel & co. were up binge drinking and making a HUGE bloody racket until 5.00 this morning. And in their drunken stupors, they forgot to take all their stuff from the kitchen when they eventually slithered off to bed. This morning on the counter, I found a load of paperwork on how to put someone into a senior home and have it paid through Medicare or Medicaid, which means the step-sibs plan to have step-dad shipped off somewhere asap so they can go forward with their plans to take my house. How do I know that's their plan? Welllllll, along with all the medicaid/senior home stuff, I also found two different CMA's for MY HOUSE. 
>:(


...I can't even talk about this fully right now; it's just too headachy. So instead I shall discuss something more positive. 


Although I would very much like to go about getting deliciously evil revenge on vitamin*-nemesis, I have decided to cut my losses and move on. 


Because I am quitting the vitamins*. For good. 


It's strange how something can start so small, and before you know it or even realize it, you're stuck in this awful, repetitive, completely self-destructive behavior pattern. And you feel trapped in it. Like there's no possible light if you ever manage to crawl out of that tunnel. 


I had a similar "epiphany" last night as I did that time in December, when I made my largest step forward with ED recovery. (And oddly enough, last night I was also watching Lord of the Rings...). One of those "OMG how the hell did it come to this?!?" kind of moments. 


So I went through my bedroom, dug out every last vitamin*, and flushed all of them down the toilet. 


And afterwards, it honestly felt like a huge weight was lifted off my chest. 


So that's why there will probably be no revenge. I want nothing more to do with vitamin*-nemesis; and I want nothing more to do with vitamins*. It might be hellish for the first week or two, getting back to exercising without them, but I'm not going to give in. Every ache and every drop of sweat will be proof that I've given it up. I'd rather feel the aches than feel nothing, and that's really all that the vitamins* do--it's a way of completely numbing yourself to the world. And I'm sick of being numb. 


Hope you all have a nice start of the week! Every single one of you deserves nice, happy days and don't you ever forget it. ♥

But know that vengeance shall be mine. ...Oh, how it will be mine!

I shall begin with a brief disclaimer: I am about to talk about things that may make some people uncomfortable. 
If you don't like or agree with what I'm saying, feck off. 


No cartoons today. I'm too angry to make them funny. 

I have been in a bad mood. To be more precise, an ANGRY sort of bad mood.

Lemme back up.

I had a stash of vitamins* (yes, I know, leave me alone) that should have lasted me quite a long time. And then new vitamin*-friend called me one night last week and asked could she please *borrow* a few because she had run out and her supplier wasn't due to refill her stash until the weekend, and she was about to start withdrawing. Because I am a nice bloody person complete moron, I said ok, and gave her several of them (less than she had asked for, but still quite a few). She swore she would get them back to me by the weekend.

Guess what.

She didn't. 

ok maybe some hastily drawn piccatures of how angry I am...

It's been two weeks since she took them. I know she was having some personal issues and I was prepared to be lenient....

BUT THEN: Last Saturday, vitamin*-friend nemesis says she has half of the thingies she owes me. I said I couldn't come get them that night because I was already out, but if she was willing to throw them in my mailbox (like old vitamin*-muffin used to :*O), I would throw her a few bucks for gas. She said cool--no problem.

Later I get a text that she had to do some family thing, so she gave my thingies to her best friend to drop off. Then around midnight, she texts again and says that Friend said the drop-off was done.

I go check my mailbox: No money. No thingies.

I don't get angry very often. Anyone who knows me well will tell you that you would need to perform some truly epic feats of douchebaggery to get me angry or offended. Some of us are just like that.

The problem with people like me is that when someone manages to push me into actual ANGER, the reaction is like 100x what it would be in a normal person. A normal person gets angry and talks smack about you behind your back until they eventually get over it. Me? I get angry and I will RUIN YOUR F**KING LIFE.

Of course the friend says she totally dropped the stuff off. And now vitamin*-nemesis has gone from "I swear I'll talk to her" to avoiding my calls and texts. And she still owes me the rest of my thingies back.

I cannot even begin to put my rage into words. Paul#2 (we're speaking again, against my better judgment....) says I should break both of their legs and then run over their dogs and burn their houses down, and I must admit I find that course of action incredibly appealing. I still don't know who the friend is, though. I have my suspicions, and once they are confirmed SUCH VENGEANCE SHALL I RAIN DOWN UPON HER YOU WON'T BELIEVE IT.

When it comes to Serious Vengeance, I have no morals. None.

I may or may not keep all y'all updated on this, depending on how illegal it gets.....