Someone call the ambulance; there's gonna be an accident......

My mother used to work with this guy named Vinnie. I have only vague memories of him, as I was only four years old at the time. She worked with Vinnie at a printing company in Carlstadt, and I remember him having dark eyes and dark hair, and wearing nice suits, but I don't remember if he was handsome or not, or how I even gauged handsome at the age of four.

On weekends, Mum often had lots of friends over on Friday or Saturday nights, or she would meet those same friends for dinner and some drinks at Il Villagio (it wasn't that fancy back then...). Some of my earliest memories are of Il Villagio--in particular memories of falling asleep in the booth after my dinner of noodles with butter (which wasn't even on the menu, but they made it anyway because it was among the only 4 things I would eat in general {plain pasta, potatoes in any form, chicken nuggets, and chocolate}). I have vivid memories of laying down in the booth while Mum and her friends ate and drank, and of being showered with salt (Mum uses a TON of salt).

I was in love with Vinnie. I was actually convinced that we were getting married, and I told him so one weekend when Mum had him and a bunch of other friends over for barbequed steak and drinks. The adults present, of course, just laughed because they probably thought it was cute--how adorable, this kind of odd and sullen-faced little girl wants to marry handsome (let's just say he was) 30-something Vinnie from accounts payable.

I did not find this funny in the slightest. I fully intended to marry Vinnie. But Mum sent me off to bed and made me say goodnight to him, and I recall feeling kind of pissed off that no one had taken me seriously.

That was the second time I tried to run away.

Vinnie had a silver sports car. I knew which one it was because he had shown it to Mum and me when he arrived that evening. So I packed some essentials into my Care Bears backpack after Mum had sent me up to bed, and then crept downstairs, out the front door, and found Vinnie's car in the driveway. Lucky for me, he had left his silver sports car unlocked.

I presume I fell asleep in the backseat, because my memory goes blank there. The next thing I recall is coming home (with Vinnie) to my mother and not understanding why she was mad at me when she was the one who ruined my wedding.

'Tis interesting what a child's mind remembers. 

Recipe time!

I came up with this all by myself--a tasty and slightly healthier version of French fries. I have successfully served this to children without telling them that it contains Strange Vegetables, and they all liked it. 'Tis also very easy to make.

You will need:

- Parsnips

- Olive oil

- Salt and Pepper

- Rosemary, sage, thyme, and oregano

To prepare:

- Preheat your oven to 350 degrees F. I usually do these in the toaster oven, but you can do them in the regular oven as well. I line the baking pan with foil, because it makes for easier cleaning, and grease it with just a tiny bit of the olive oil rubbed on the foil.

- Cut up the parsnips into French fry shapes. I make them just about the size of Wendy's French fries, but you can really make them whatever size you want--just make sure you adjust the cooking time.

- Dump all the cut up parsnips in a mixing bowl. Add enough olive oil to coat them evenly, but not too much oil or they end up too greasy (last time I made this, I used about 1 1/2 tbsp olive oil for 6 smallish-medium parsnips). Then sprinkle on some rosemary, thyme, and sage to your taste. And add a pinch of oregano (I'm not crazy about lots of oregano, so I only use a tiny pinch, but you can really use as much as you want). Mix it up together so the parsnips are evenly coated with the herbs. Add some salt and pepper as well.

- I prep the baking pan by throwing in a tiny bit of whipped butter (after coating the foil very lightly with the oil), and then sticking the pan in the oven for a couple minutes just until the butter melts, but you don't have to use the butter. I just think it adds a bit of a nicer flavour to the parsnips.

- Then dump the parsnips into the pan, and try to spread them out evenly. Cook about 30 minutes (less if your French fries are smaller, longer if they're larger).

Delicious!

♥