Wednesday, December 7, 2011

I would not take this thing, if it lay by the highway. Not were Minas Tirith falling in ruin and I alone could save her, so, using the weapon of the Dark Lord for her good and my glory. No, I do not wish for such triumphs...

A friend and I had the most nerdalicious hour-long conversation EVER last night. We discussed how you can psychologically profile someone based on their favourite character in Lord of the Rings. As far as all the people we know, our conclusions are quite accurate (obvs with a couple exceptions). Here's what we came up with--

If your fav character is:

- Frodo - You are the everyman, humble but also courageous. You're probably the quiet type.

- Sam - Yeah we get it, everyone knows you're a great person and a really good friend, or at least you'd like everyone to think that. The sad truth of the matter is that people like Sam do not actually exist, but sure you're probably trying your best.

- Gollum - Put the drugs down.

- Eomer - You are probably a woman. Or maybe a gay man. (We don't wanna discriminate.) Whatever you are, you appreciate very manly good-looking dudes, and your personality is probably of the Alpha persuasion.

- Legolas - You are definitely into dudes.

- Aragorn - You're probably male and you wish you rocked that hard. Too bad no one actually rocks that hard.

- Merry and/or Pippin - You're just all around awesome, and you enjoy the simple comforts in life. Mainly eating, drinking, and being merry.
- ...and if your fav is just Merry - Same as above, but you read the books before you saw the movies.

- Gandalf - You are a giant nerd and we salute you for it.

- Faramir - Congrats, you read all three books. You're also probably about as close in personality to Aragorn as any real human could hope to be; you just don't brag about it.

- Galadriel - You are strong with the Force. ...and you're probably kind of a weirdo.

- Arwen - You're a dude. If you're not a dude, you are a hopeless romantic, and you might want to try and accept the fact that you will never find anyone in real life as awesome as Aragorn. He just doesn't exist.

- Eowyn - You, m'lady, are more awesome than you think you are. Don't be so hard on yourself. ....You also might be a feminist.

 - Saruman - You're an asshole.

- Treebeard - Hippie!!

- Tom Bomadil - You rock harder than pretty much everyone, ever.

- Gimli - You like video games. A lot. (I disputed this, but since I couldn't think of anything else it stays...)

- The Mouth of Sauron - You laugh at innappropriate moments, are fluent in sarcasm, and you might be a sociopath.

- Theoden - Good job, you're a mature adult!

- That Drunk Hobbit at Bilbo's Birthday Party - You are the life and soul of everybody's party. 

Anyone like anime? These nearly decapitated me when they fell out of my closet. I'm pretty sure I stole them from someone...
...claimed on a first-come-first-serve basis. You can take all or a few. 


  1. This is actually one of my favourite posts ever, I actually bookmarked it! I used to love Lord of the Rings and this awesome guide has reminded me how cool it is. You and your friend really do have the best hour long conversations!

  2. This is BRILLIANT. It totally applies to everyone I know as well...... xD

  3. Just last night, I was lamenting the lack of Tom Bombadil's awesomeness in the films... He rocks SO hard. That being said, I agree that this post is completely accurate... and needed to be written. Well done, Mich, xx

  4. I used to be into anime, but then I fell in hove with Harry Potter and now, The Hunger Games! I loved this post very much, mainly because I like LoTR. Eowyn was my fav (I had hair to look like hers before I cut it all off and dyed it...). Since she's my fav, I would say your psychology profile is correct :D

  5. What about Boromir? :D

  6. Haha me and my brother used to be obsessed wit lord of the rings! I read the hobbit, but at the time I was too young to real the trillogy, andi haven't had time since :/ we got the box set of films a week ago though!
    My favourite was always Arwen, but not coz I'm a guy or liked Aragorn, it was that scene this the river in the fellowship, where the White horses came and she had that scratch on her cheek - it just mesmerised me!
    Lottie x

  7. i'm pretty sure your version of the mouth of sauron is the greatest thing that has ever happened on blogger.

  8. I WILL TAKE ALL OR A FEW EITHER WAY <3 Neon Genesis Evangelion plz. I've been meaning to watch it!

    I fucking love Eowyn. I've gotten into hardcore arguments with a friend about Eowyn versus Ardwen, and nobody can convince me that giving up immortality is worth it for a dude.

    (You know my email is an edu email, and I just emailed you asking for your address so I can send you an xmas present.)


  9. Ummm...which one was Dominic Monaghan? That dude's awesome. I saw the first LOTR movie once, but I don't remember who was who (besides Frodo and Gandalf of course) Despite this, your post made me lol as always. I just hope I'm not Saruman!

    If your lil sis has any music recommendations for me, I'd be happy to hear 'em!

  10. Gollum, put the drugs down hahaha I love it. You've outdone yourself with this one. Me, I'm an Aragorn fan always was, And when they made the movie and cast Vigo Mortensen I was one happy camper. Nice bit o' man flesh there.

    And I love anime. My daughter got us hooked on it when she was little, We used to pay big money to have that stuff shipped to Ireland. It was outrageous, but we did it.

  11. oh fuck... Eowyn is my fave. Always was!

    Dammit i can't be that damn kickass!!!
    I read the books as a kid so i only have the vaguest memories of Bombadil. I think at the time i just laughed and read on. And something about bad poetry? I do know i still have issues with respecting poetry, issues that are definitely not rooted in anything logical.
    I do remember thinking Legolas was kinda cool tho.. something about how he could keep walking and moving but also somehow mentally resting, so he didn't need sleep or something.
    And did Merry really know it was Eowyn from the get-go? Didn't she have another name for a while? Some long name i could never remember how to spell...

  12. and forgot to say... as always... LOVE YOUR PICS!
    And love this post.
    And love you too.

  13. I like anime, just not evangelion. Ugh! Smart move ditching that!

    Bwahahaha! I love the profiles. Eowyn+Treebeard+Bombadil. The first time I read the books I stayed the hell away from willow trees for about two years. (Hey, I was 10!)

    I miss nerdalicious conversations. The only bad thing about not hanging out with the KAOS crowd=lack of decent conversation.

    Please excuse me, Imma go drool over your Treebeard XD


  14. I got excited at your comment. We can look and bright lights and sneeze in unison, always! (I've never met anyone who does this before - bonfire night is a favourite of mine but it's a pretty tricky thing to watch the display and sneeze and not burst an eye socket in the process).

    This has to be my favourite post all year. I'd just got the books out to re-read for the million'th time the other day so I'll be doing that asap. It did sadden me a lot that Tom Bombadil is not in the films. Although I can see why - if you were watching the films as a means to enjoy them and not for their accuracy from the books, any anti-nerd would probably consider his appearance, 'mighty confusing'.

    Have a lovely week.

  15. I love how all of them have this weird-ass eye-twitch thing going on! Im a massive fan of LOTR and I must say you've done all of them justice with your deeply analytic profiles ;)
    Agreed with you most on Tom bombadil hahah

  16. Someday I really want to read these books - I tried reading The Hobbit twice, to no avail - I just couldn't get past Bilbo's birthday party (that's The Hobbit, right?). Anyway, stereotypically, Sam was always my favorite movie character. I just think he's the best freaking friend ever. Wouldn't we all be so lucky to have a friend like him?

    P.S. Is the Thomas Kinkade background new? It doesn't seem very Mich haha but it sure is festive!

  17. This is my fav post of yours, ever. I saved it to my bookmarks and everything.
    Theoden + Dancing Butterflies = EPIC WIN

  18. I missed you toooo! So much!

    I have never actually read or seen Lord of the Rings. But my nickname in AP Lit was "Samwise", and after reading this I believe that's a compliment...

  19. rolling on the floor!! very accurate as always, my dear

  20. My favorite charater is the guy working at the inn. You didn't mention him! My second favorite character is the ring, you didn't mention it either.

  21. pahahahahahaaaaa!

    i love your picture of saruman.

    x x x x x

  22. The only ring Gollum was concerned with was a drug-ring. It all makes sense now. In fact, now that I think about it, I think I sat next to him on the subway today. The smell is still on my coat...

  23. Aragorn is my favourite... hehe i'm totally a dude ;)

  24. Yeah, I'm with Amber! Eowyn all the way! I love how you've drawn her on Tex! Very me!

    Speaking of Amber, I'm going to convince her to get her Eowyn locks back for summer! The new colour she's put on looks awesome, though!

    Love you! :)

  25. Hey Mich...I don't know for sure if you'll remember me, but I just wanted to say hello. Jesus, everyone I used to be so close with has so many followers now. I hope you are well.

  26. I remember the drunken hobbit from Bilbos party! He was a very great character! Fun, entertaining, deep! Hes my favorite out of the ones you listed!

  27. I liked Legolas, he shot people in the head. :(

    And I generally prefer the Manga.

  28. This post and pic's....Mich, they are simply AMAZING!!!!!!! You have, as another wrote, totally outdone yourself!

    Now i must see the trilogy...have the feeling i am the only one who hasn't! So very out of the "Ring"!

    Miss you...coming back soon?

    "There's no pleasing some people."


  29. I love you. This awesome it's making me use the word 'awesome'. Really, it's awesome.
    I still need to read the third book (blasphemy, I know). I was reading them a while back and then got distracted with stuff, like school stuff that made me read other stuff that wasn't Lord of the Rings. Hrmph. This year saw me read the Harry Potter books, so I declare next year I shall re-read/read Lord of the Rings!
    I still have an eternal soft spot for Merry and Pippin. I can't help it, though the Drunk Hobbit is pretty close from that picture alone (and now I have to rewatch the films to see him in action. It's been a while and I don't remember him!)

  30. I didn't read the my favorite character is....the one that looks the hottest without his clothes, abs...biceps...OH MY!!

    I also like the Treebeard because he looks like he's gonna put his hand up on his hip when he dips, i dip, we dip....


We say whatever we want to whomever we want, at all times.