At least you have your health.

So I have a question for any of you lovely readers who are in the medical profession....

For the past several months, I have been manifesting some odd symptoms. Three in particular have become somewhat bothersome:

1. The Headache. I'm not sure when it started, but it occurred to me about 2 weeks ago that it does not stop. Some days it gets worse than usual, which it did when I was coughing violently for 2 weeks, and I realized then that I don't even notice the basic headache anymore because it never goes away. I think this one is probably stress, but that makes it no less annoying. It also could be because I never wear my glasses.

anyway....

2. The Random Chest Pains. The first one occurred about six months ago--it's an extremely sharp pain in the very middle of my chest, which sometimes makes it hard to breathe properly. I thought maybe indigestion, but it happens both recently after eating, and when I haven't eaten in 2+ hours. It happens when I'm exerting myself and when I'm not exerting myself. I never know when it will strike, but it makes me nervous.

3. Morning Sickness. And NO, unless it is the Second Coming of the Messiah (or the antichrist) I am not pregnant. Every morning, about an hour to 90 minutes after I get up, I feel sick. Like about-to-vomit sick. (On 2 occasions I have actually vomited.) It does not make a difference whether I eat breakfast or not, neither does what I have for breakfast make a difference. EVERY. SINGLE. MORNING. It's starting to get obnoxious because it now takes me twice as long as usual to get ready for work or whatever. 

Is there something wrong with me? As y'all know by now, I am not inclined to go to the doctor, especially if I may have something serious. Also my health insurance will absolutely not cover anything more than a basic doctor visit (i.e., it will not cover blood tests, MRI's, etc etc), and I'll probably end up getting a bill for the doctor visit anyway because no doubt Whoreizon Blue Cross Blue Shield will claim that whatever it is, it's pre-existing. 

.....Also since the apocalypse is coming, I see no point in getting anything treated until after the world ends.

Lend me ten pounds, I'll buy you a drink.

A real post!! Sort of.... 
As always, I feel like a bad blogger. I just don't have as much time for it as I'd like what with work and writing and TV and making sure Lil Sis never has too much fun partying at Rutgers. 

Since I got rid of the security thingy for the comments (I had to; those things make me feel like I've lost my mind),

I've been getting a lot of spam comments. Blogger catches all of them, because apparently the spammers are all morons and never take the time to even try to learn English and/or not sound like a robot. Usually it's something like this:

"It's the best time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I've read this post and if I could I desire to suggest you few interesting things or suggestions. Maybe you could write next articles referring to this article. I desire to read even more things about it! Stop by my web site; engineering internship" 

and then a link to some website

Today brought my favourite one ever:

"forum warned of 'C breathe' Google hit with a prediction intent stay at this horizontal or possibly hiding place farther and get slaveless skin You'll always create by mental act halt on top of that, a large status Your 60s: A place beachlike 3 Shares the FTSE Should mystify 24-hour interval BP Lifts bonus by 12.5% My list Edit RSS feeds supercharged by Image: Hera are 5 hurried course to the publisher Costliest U.S. Catastrophes tip germane disasters can hit with teeny dissuasive. Here are the top of the creation knows they should be added to Wed if benefactor Ben introduces QE 3 we are expiration higher now which instrumentation you can yield to shut away off for unrestrained to see what happens!.They individual visited our management is crossways the administrative division, and millions bear been ineffectual to depute their trust ins report can rack on the grip. No search hard has oversubscribed the game and may be tacked with the IOC of the key results would fuck doubled in regard when the develop could end up in any securities mentioned above: MA change out how to guess a compile's prox presentation.

There is elfin other to business deal and benefit from your investing in open universities in Asian nation eruditeness programme manikin 275 KB (PDF) Association of Southeast Asian Nations holdfast quick Rules of Bursa Asian nation Rules sac Malaya database Requirements sac Asian nation erudition is now a days. They make out these conversations, my friends who forfeit his job. Sell: No so much recommendation.

Sponsored golf course: sheet Stats : 290 members

/ 1656 guests (24 hrs) Rambus, Inc."

Umm what

Their link is for some site that sells recommendations on penny stocks. Armed with that single piece of intelligible information, I will now translate what these people are trying to say:

Dear Potential Customer,

Google (also known as The Oracle) has predicted that if you remain in a horizontal position in an unspecified far away hiding spot, you will achieve your ultimate dream of getting Slaveless Skin. Unfortunately, your resulting high social status won't be much use to you because you will age 60 years overnight and all your brain functions will shut down.

I don't know why we're levitating; just go with it. And those are the slaves falling off, in case you couldn't tell. 

 Also say goodbye to your timeshared beach property, because the combined forces of the London Stock Exchange and BP are going to hypnotize you and convince you to hand over your now super-powered beach property to Hera, Queen of the Gods, who is going to sell said property in order to fund the self-publishing of her upcoming book--The Germane Guide to the Most Expensive Teeny Disasters in United States History.

On an unrelated note, God approves of Ben Bernanke's opinion on the US's next attempt at economic stimulation, even though this attempt will inevitably lead to the apocalypse. In fact, God visited our management office the other day, and the administrative offices, which are across the hall from management, to congratulate us on the millions of bears currently employed by our company. Even though we admit they are somewhat ineffectual at their jobs, every single one of those bears could crush your skull with their incredible grip.

[The following sentence is vulgar and I refuse to translate it.]

By using our products and services, the Elves have now assumed control over all of the Asian Nations. Their golf course is glorious.

I hope all of you in the US have a wonderful Thanksgiving! Mine should be interesting, as Stepmom has decided we're going out to eat (which is the holiday-heresy equivalent of burning down a church while wearing a Satan costume and having an orgy in the church's front garden) because apparently she doesn't feel like shopping/cooking/cleaning. And apparently she feels that Big Sis#2 and I are too incompetent to do it ourselves because there was no discussion of possible alternatives. Oh and also apparently Big Sis#2's incompetence merits Stepmom inviting her and then UNINVITING her to dinner, so now Big Sis#2 is not speaking to Dad or Stepmom and can you tell how totally awesome and exciting Thanksgiving is going to be this year because I sure can and let me tell you I am super stoked. 

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