Went hiking twice this weekend. I got really excited on Saturday because the woods smelled like autumn. I hope that means we'll have an early autumn, because summer seriously sucked this year. It was hot and humid (like up in the 90's hot) almost every effing day. This is god punishing us for last summer, which was lovely and cold and rainy until the last week in August, when it got a little bit hotter, and then cooled down as soon as September showed up. Best summer ever.
Look, it's a hawk eating a chipmunk!!
You can't see it properly, but it was there. He sat up on that utility pole and chowed down on the chipmunk for like 20 minutes.Then he got annoyed (perhaps because we were watching and taking photos of him) and flew away.
Tomorrow, I am off to the beach with my Little Sis, her Friend, and ..... my Mother. We shall be there, at a nice non-white-trash beach just above ... ::gag:: Seaside. (I don't know either, but I'm scared).
For those of you unfamiliar with the Jersey Shore: Seaside is to beach as double-wide is to living space.
And DO NOT believe any of the classless rubbish you see on that awful television show, Jersey Shore. Those arseholes aren't even from New Jersey!!! Those are the kinds of people that us NJ natives hate, because they come into our glorious state thinking they can just have the craic down the shore and make retards of themselves at our expense. I'm pretty sure Snookie is the missing link. And that guy with the mutant abs should have been drowned at birth.
Seriously, that show makes me want to rip my hair out and start supporting the mass extermination of idiots.
...Anyway, back to my shore trip. I am not thin enough for the beach. Since the 3-day Master Cleanse last week, I am back up to 104 and my weight will not budge, no matter how many hours I work out or how little I eat. I shall have to amp up the workouts and eat even less, as I am going to the beach again at the end of the month and I absolutely cannot be seen on Long Beach Island (LBI is to beach as mansion is to home) unless I weigh 101 lbs or less.
I also don't know how I'm going to survive 5 days alone with Mum. Little Sis and Friend will be off doing their own thing, which means Mum will be following me around like a lost puppy because she is terrified of being alone and is incapable of entertaining herself. She also has not mastered the whole idea of inner monologue, so any peace and quiet I hope to have will be shattered fairly early on. I plan on taking long, looooong walks since I'll have no treadmill. That should by me some quiet alone time.
(That spot is in Old Tappan, NJ - not a long walk, but it's lovely and quiet, and oh so pretty.)
I added more of my fiction works-in-progress to my other website.
I also put up the complete versions of the finished books. I would love some feedback on the unfinished stuff, if any of y'all are interested in reading!! (I'll take feedback on the finished stuff too; I'm not picky.) There's a pretty good variety of fiction - middle grade fun stuff, YA, and whacked out adult fiction. READ IT!!! I have writer's block - I need some direction. Even if you just read the first paragraph of one of the works-in-progress and tell me it sucks, at least I'll know not to keep wasting my time on that project....
The one about the fairies seems to be popular with readers of all ages. My guinea pig children have enjoyed it, and a friend who snuck a peek at it while I was in the shower demanded to know where the rest of it is, so I presume she liked it. The rest is not written yet, but it's getting there....
So I hung out with that boy again last night. He's a nice boy, pretty attractive - the sort you'd bring home to mum and dad and they would be happy about it. The only problem is that those sorts of boys are most definitely not my type. This is more my type:
I don't care what anyone says - Rob Zombie is magically delicious! :D
Part of me - some small, idealistic voice in the back of my head - is telling me to go for it. It's the part of me that likes the IDEA of being in a relationship. Boyfriends are a nice normal thing to have. There's some kind of weird security in having a boyfriend, right? It seems that way, and part of me wants to be normal and secure.
But the louder voice that is closer to my real self is like f*ck that.
I go through this weird boy-cycle more often than I'd like. I meet a nice boy, go out with him a few times, decide that maybe I want to be his "girlfriend;" and then my real brain suddenly kicks in and I'm like WTF AM I DOING?!?! and I make a run for it. I think I should just quit while I'm ahead on this one, because I know that if I keep going, I WILL eventually leave him in the dust and run screaming back to my single life.
I can't help it. I really do prefer being alone. It's a control thing, I guess. If I can't control his every waking moment and his personality, then I see no point in keeping him around. And I get so bored so easily. Unless you can make me laugh - like REALLY keep me amused, then maybe I'll keep you around. But so far, only 2 boys in my personal history have managed to keep me laughing long enough to avoid being tossed aside like a used tissue. At present, one of them is dead, and the other one... Well, there's a few choice words I would have for him, but if you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything at all, right?
There's the Intimacy Problem as well. I'm sure that's the largest issue, but it's not going away anytime soon. I don't like being touched. At all. Ever. In order for me to be physically intimate with a boy, I need to be either SH*TFACED drunk, or on some serious drugs. Never marijuana though, because the paranoia will be biblically epic. I mean I like sex [almost] as much as the next girl, but I need to be drunk to do it. And I have a very hard time mixing sex with emotional intimacy. To me, they are two very different things and I would prefer that they remain separate.
Ah well.
Off to work out and watch Sailor Moon! And then out for a hike later with my bestie. Have a nice day, my girlies!!
