Monday, September 19, 2011

That rug really tied the room together, did it not? And this guy peed on it.

As of today, I am going to try and give up sugar. ...this should be interesting. 

My birthday is in 2 days, on Wednesday. I don't like birthdays, not really. I mean yeah it's nice getting cards and presents and a cake just for you, but it makes me feel awkward. I don't like people making a fuss over me. I feel like I'm not worth it. :/ I do love the family dinner party thing, too. I love parties in general, but not when I'm the centerpiece. 

(I was That Kid.)

I told Mum that my birthday dinner out should be my present (family birthday tradition: not only do you get the at-home family dinner of your favourite foods, you also get a dinner out at your favourite restaurant). Mum is taking me to one of my fav restaurants ever (Esty Street) and since I know it's expensive and we don't really have any money, I think that is a perfectly nice present and I don't need her to spend too much money on me. 

Mum was offended by this. 

So today at work I made a Birthday Present List with pictures, and gave it to her when I got home. (Mum's reactions are in purple):

For my birthday, I would like 

1.) A big horse
["Funny."] I can ride it into battle with

2.) An antique Colt Peacemaker.


3.) I would also like eternal winter.


4.) Stephanie March

wearing this:

["What happened to the magazine I gave you?"]

5.) Jeff Hardy
wearing nothing.


6.) This fabulous Christian Lacriox dress:
and Lacroix shoes to go with it.

["And wear the hell would you wear them?"]

7.) This first edition of Andreas Vesalius' De humani corporis fabrica libri septem. 

["It's HOW much?? For a bloody BOOK?!?"]

Seriously, it's only $375,000.00. Just throw it on the AmEx. 

Hope you're all having a good start to the week. I feel like a bloated sack of protoplasm since the shore trip, and eating rubbish all weekend. And eating too much today. I want to not eat tomorrow AT ALL. Really badly. And then eat nothing on Wednesday to prep for the birthday dinner. And eat nothing Thursday and Friday to make up for the birthday dinner. 

Idk how I'll do with food the next couple days, but will try my best not to go crazier, or collapse in public. 



  1. You'd wear the dress and shoes while riding into battle on your steed, OF COURSE.

    As for the eternal winter, there's always Antarctica. It has a great climate for the preservation of rare books. (Dry and cold)

    That horse happens to be one of my favourite breeds. Friesians looks like a cross between Andalucians and Clydesdales (Another two of my favourite breeds. I really should do a post about this!)

    Shit, if I had the money I'd finish and courier your MLP mod (Remember the deep-sea momma mutant horse? Yeah, she's still under construction) up to the states. Considering that Wednesday is tomorrow down here, I don't think it will be possible :(

    I recommend some fruit and veggie noms, if you can do it. It'll help push the crap food out of your system and give you a bit of energy. Gah, I dunno.

    Love you <3

  2. good luck with the food sitch on your birthday, i ended up vomming it :/

    I hope your bday is a gazillion times better!

  3. I've always wanted to have a horse too.. I was even ready to keep it in our garage.

  4. I liked your list, seemed real realistic to me. lol. Your mom's reactions were funny, I think if I gave my mom a list like that she would just look at me strangely and throw it away. Hope you have a great b-day diner and a fun tme.


  5. But it's Lacroix, Sweetie! Mums, honestly!

    I hope your birthday turns out to be really good and filled with surprises! I'm sure you will make sensible food choices before, during and after the big day.

    Take kelp tablets and lots of water (grimace) for the bloating! Sorry, I know you hate it!

    Feel better soon! :)

  6. Happy (early) birthday to you :)
    I think I was That Kid, too. I always hated it when pass the parcel stopped on me, and then I'd have to unwrap the parcel with all the other kids looking at me...*shudder*. Obviously I was a highly extraverted child.
    I can kind of picture you as the kick ass Queen of Eternal Winter, riding your horse in your shoes and dress, threatening spring with your antique peacemaker..

  7. I was the same about birthday's, I generally didn't understand it all. At other kid's parties I didn't like/ know what the foods were and I didn't like the games and yes I hid under the table...or in one case - under the bouncy castle.
    I hope you have a nice day anyway though, and I love your birthday list! xxx

  8. I can relate to the whole feeling awkward thing on birthdays, but it's still kind of nice :) I don't know what the problem is with the presents really, I mean, the book seems reasonably priced ;)

  9. Seems like a perfectly reasonable birthday list to me. I've always felt weird about birthdays, as well... not sure what to do with myself

  10. Happy early birthday luv! I hope you have an awesome one tomorrow and you get the horse and the sexy chicka you asked for- or at least something awesome like that. My family's just the opposite- we're more of the, "Happy birthday, here's a card with a bit of money" and we're done with it type. That's the way I like it personally. Though if mom every did ask me in the future what I wanted, I would ask for loads of witchcraft stuff just to freak her out :P



  12. Happy Bday tomo!!

    Birthdays can be such a brat sometimes :( But I really hope u can njoy it as much as poss,
    I like ur blog, And thoe shoes - ohmygod,


  13. You're gonna give up sugar?!? Whoa...good luck lady!

    Did your mom yell "YOU DON'T NEED A GUN" or did you just type it in caps? I'm picturing her yelling that at you. I'm lolling.

    And Stephanie March....yumm-my! if you don't get her for your birthday, can I have her? You can have the tattoo guy...and the gun and the horsie.

    Forget the book, though. No book is worth $375,000.... because mine hasn't been published yet. ha!

  14. your birthday is in half an hour! I was going to stay up and post right at midnight, but alas, I am weak and fading fast... so HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICH!!!! I hope you get all the presents you asked for ;) xoxo

  15. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MICH!!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3 <3 this post literally made me laugh for five minutes. i can always count on you to do that. :D have a lovely birthday, and your mother... good responses. ::facepalm:: ;)

  16. Happy (belated) Birthday you celebrated author and kickass blogger and all around great individual!
    Perfectly reasonable list too. Wow that dress is gorgeous! Do they make it in greens?
    Ooooo I want that lovely piece you chose for Stephaniefor my own list...but I want the Ronson twins wearing that. And I am soooo going to hell for wanting both of them. Not at the same time ofc...I hate having my attention divided.

    Hope you had a great time and perhaps got lucky with a hottie! Sex is such good exercise.

  17. Have a wonderful birthday Mich! You deserve every gift on your list and so much more!

    That horse is amazing and i love the party picture!

    Sending Love,

  18. I feel the SAME way about birthdays....mine's in November and its my 25th so everyone is trying to get me to celebrate....I told me mom for my present she can just go away and stay out somewhere....I want aloneness. She thinksof course I'm crazy but I think I got my wish. The restaurant looks yummy. I hope your mom ends up taking you!

  19. Hope it was lovely and the noshing was only moderately guilt-inducing, and that you got at least ONE of your gifts (wouldn't be fair to make your birthday a TOTAL letdown). And I'm curious about what the magazine was...

  20. Happy early birthday!! :) I hope it was amazing and the dinner was delicious!
    Your birthday present want list is hilarious lol I am going to do something like that for my girlfriend so she wont get me anything.. I also hate being the center of attention :/ so birthdays are always weird and to me way too over the top if you ask me! But then again it always depends on my mood:P

    Hope you had a lovely day!!

  21. I love the big horse and the rad dress. SO MUCH.
    I can't believe I missed your preemptive birthday post. It wasn't until your POST birthday POST that I realized it was your birthday. Yesterday.

    I heart you to pieces!! I'm not gonna say "I hope it was the best birthday ever" because I read the next post. BUT it is so awesome you're going to meet your fave author.


  22. Delayed response/comment... Ah well. I hope your birthday was bitchin'! It could not have been as bad as mine... where I showed up to my condo and had to divvy up all my possessions with the ex.... that shit was awkward lol.

  23. Just catching up on blogs - I'm so behind!
    I feel exactly the same on my birthday and we do the birthday meal thing! Ive said I don't want that this year though :P hope you had a great day :)
    Lottie x


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