Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Over that boy hand.

I GOT A JOB!


...
!!!!!!!


I start Friday. 9 to 5, working for an eccentric lawyer. He seems fun. Hopefully he'll be as fun as Previous Boss, who put up with me telling him off for making a mess in his office, booby trapping his stapler, and a constant stream of Lord of the Rings quotes, among other things. 


Haven't weighed myself yet, but I've done well these past 2 days. Exercising like a mofo every morning (800 cals burned both days). Consumed 390 cals yesterday, and 750 today (too much-_-). I will be 95 lbs by Christmas. I WILL. >_<


I just made a big feckin mess on my desk.
Box of 50 cd's, and I knocked it the eff over. Because I'm a clumsy blonde. And because I have ocd, I shan't be able to rest until they are all back in the box in the correct numerical order. BOLLOCKS.


I'm currently trying to put some of that collection into itunes so it can then go into my ipod, but the laptop is not having any of it. I've got 16 days of music on there already. I think it might be taking up kind of a lot of hard drive space or something. There's another two box sets (Vivaldi and Haydn) that need to go on my ipod as well. I may have to wait for the new computer. 


Speaking of classical music, I noticed today that Jeff Spurgeon has still not accepted my friend request on Facebook
There's no way to talk about this without sounding like a complete lunatic, so imma just forge on ahead...
I <3 Jeff. I have loved him for several years, and listen to him on the radio OBSESSIVELY every morning (5.30 am to 10 am). He's hilarious. I'm friends with a few of the other peeps from the radio station (WQXR--non-stop classical music), but for some reason Jeff will not accept. I've even poked him once or twice! Nothing. This makes me want to cry like a jilted lover. 


.....yeah


Little Sis came out with a great quote this evening: "I love how you  have a poster of Pinhead next to Marilyn Monroe and Harry Potter, and you're just chillaxing on your antique sofa listening to classical music while sharpening a big-ass sword. And of course you're not wearing pants. YOU ARE INSANE."


I had to write that one down. I think it sums me up fairly well. 
I never wear trousers in the house. I find them cumbersome. 

Monday, November 29, 2010

I'm going to complain now.

I'm doing my best to comment on everyone's blogs. I know I've fallen really far behind and I'm sorry, girls!! 

There is FECKALL on tv. Why do we actually have to pay for this rubbish??
I really don't understand why channel 3 needs to play The Family Stone multiple times a day when they should be having the usual 4 back to back episodes of Criminal Minds. The dvd player is all the way on the other side of the room, and the Criminal Minds dvd's are even further away. I don't want to get up.

I'm fat. Why should I bother getting up? It'll only burn calories. And I don't even deserve to burn calories. This holiday weekend, I beasted my way through the contents of several kitchens. So now begins the Pre-Christmas Detox. Idk when or how often I'll be weighing myself. At least not until the bloating has subsided. The Ex Lax is currently harpooning its way through my digestive system, so hopefully I'll feel slightly smaller by tomorrow evening.

I don't understand why anyone would pay $50,000 for a purse. And not even a nice purse. It looks like a fast food take out bag made of animal hide.  

Completely non-functional, too. Inside, it has one tiny pocket. You'd probably have an easier time finding your stuff if you used a bucket as a purse.

So yesterday I watched Shutter Island. it ruined my night. Why?
This is Max Von Sydow:

(The guy on the left). I think he's pretty delicious. At least that's what he looked like in the Seventh Seal--one of my fav movies since I fell in love with Max at age 12. 

But in Shutter Island, he looks like this:

I know we all have to get old sometime, but it just upset me.
And the ending of that movie was retarded.

Have any of you ever taken lithium carbonate? My friend who supplies me my vitamins* gave me two things that are apparently 300mg of lithium carbonate (to apologize for the grievously long wait for my vitamins*) and I don't really know what they do. I mean I know what it's for, but what are the effects? Is it like a sedative?
And I love how he was just like, "yeah sorry I'm late; have two of these" without even telling me what they were. I had to look them up on drugs.com.
Such an exciting life I lead.

<3

Saturday, November 27, 2010

Jingle bells, Batman smells.....

I had one of my apocalyptic dreams last night. (I have those a lot.) As these dreams often do, it involved me in a post-apocalyptic world trying to escape the new fascist government. I ended up running into Emily Browning in my dream, and it occurred to me--as I stood beside her--how very heinously fat I am. 


*~*~*~*~*


I decorated the house for Christmas yesterday!! :D Christmas does something to my brain. It's like a month-long psychopathic episode.
So I apologize in advance if my posting and commenting becomes a bit sparse. From now until December 25th, I shall be in a total holiday frenzy, most likely making my way steadily back into the 100s. But I will not care until sometime around New Year's, at which point I will have a nervous breakdown and start starving again. 

Tuesday, November 23, 2010

How did that g0bshite get on the television?!


The password is: this is who we are

Vlog Nov 23 10 from Mich H on Vimeo.
I said I'd do a vlog (aaages ago) and I don't like going back on my word, so there you go: A short little ramble that brings out my total lack of chin. The making of this almost crashed my computer, so the next vlog won't be up until Christmas Day, at which time I shall make a drunken masterpiece on my new computer. 

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Don't call me Len, you little prick. I'm a bishop!

Crikey
I haven't had a hangover in a while. That sucked. I spent the day flying in and out of the bathroom, tearing my room apart in search of season 2 of Oz, and then having a nervous breakdown when I found season 2 only to discover that it was missing disc 1. 


Then I calmed down and watched Father Ted instead. 


Last night I went out and got drunk with my mother. I had a salad and we shared an ice cream dessert. I felt good about the day. 


Then we went home and I consumed the contents of the pantry. I even reached the point of expired candy (Snickers). It was way worse than my usual weekend binges. The only thing that saved me was the fact that all I ate before that was dinner; and the binge happened late, so I got tired before I could really go nuts. But holy hand grenades, I couldn't even breathe afterwards. I felt like I had just run a marathon. A marathon of mega-fatness. I need to not drink alcohol.


Thankfully, today's hangover kept my cals down. And I don't think mum remembers anything from our night out, which is good because I get very honest when I'm drunk. 
>_<

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Place your cards as they're coming; came to win, lost everything...

Update: I'm on Twitter now! I have no idea what the heck I'm doing, but be my friend or something: http://twitter.com/ s1ckb1tch


I was doing so well yesterday. I did awesome all week--stayed under 600 cals most days. Then yesterday I was trying to keep it under 1200 (weekend allowance). I don't know what happened. Around 11.30, my friends and I were hanging around watching TV, and they went and got snacks. Then I got a little snack (which put me at 1100 for the day). 


And then it all went to hell.
I don't get it. What the heck is it about the weekend that makes me unable to stop, when I can stop during the week?! I NEED to figure out what it is that sets me off, because this has to stop. One binge day on the weekend won't kill me, but if I binge on Friday, I tend to binge on Saturday and Sunday as well, which is NOT OK. I need to regain control, or come Sunday I'm going to have an aneurysm. 


In other news, on Wednesday afternoon I conned my physician into prescribing me drugs. That's not on easy task with my doctor. My old Doc, Dr. Salvatorre was wonderful. He'd prescribe anything. The time I pulled something in my shoulder 2 years ago, he "examined" my injury over the phone ('cause it was a Friday and he had no appointments until Monday) and called in a prescription for percocet. Awesome.


New Dr. S? Not so much. I love him--he's a very good doctor; he's just not as prescription-happy as the old doc. It probably didn't help that when I broke my arm in January, I waited 2 weeks before going to Dr. S to get it checked out. Yeah I have a kind of  high tolerance for pain. 


Dr S knows of my pain tolerance, so it's nearly impossible to get drugs from him. I went to my appointment yesterday and gave him my well-rehearsed sob story about how stressed I am with school and trying to find a job and having no money, and trying to play housewife because I'm the one that's home all the time, and prepping for the crazy holidays coming. He didn't buy it. I could tell he didn't, so I had to go all out.
I cried. I broke down and cried that my life is a mess and I can't bloody well please everybodoy and sometimes I just can't RELAX because I'm so all over the place every friggin day. 
That was tough. I haven't made myself cry like in a long time, so I had a hard time getting it started. I only ever really cry if I'm extremely frustrated or angry. And God help you if you're the one who made me cry out of anger, because I will devote all of my efforts towards mercilessly plotting your destruction until I succeed; or until I get distracted and forget about it.


So I got a scrip for Adavan. Mission accomplished.

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

I'm not sure what made me think of this...

It's weird the little phrases that come into fashion. I hear them from Little Sis, 'cause she's a follower and thus a parrot of whatever trends come into the high school. Like who started "epic fail?" All of a sudden everyone started saying it. It's weird.


At some point in second grade, someone decided that it was really cool to say, "so what; who cares?" Whenever you tried to tell an interesting story, or state a fun fact, or recount some fond memory to a friend, you were met with a cold, nonchalant, "so what; who cares?"


It was a very nerve-wracking time for everyone in my class, I think. At any time, your friends could turn on you. And once you got hit with a "so what; who cares?" in front of a group of your peers, it was like you became a leper. No one cared what you had to say. You were unimportant, uninteresting, and unworthy of anyone's attention. 


If you got hit on a Monday it was the worst. Then you remained a leper for five whole days. Your friends shunned you until everyone eventually forgot about it over the weekend. And then the following Monday you made damn sure you hit one of your friends with a "so what; who cares?" the first chance you got. 


The "so what; who cares?" faded away after a while. I think by third grade it was replaced with the Casio Magic Diary. Remember those things?
You could put all your friends in your address book and personalize their entries by designing a face to go next to their names. You could write journal entries. You could even make it tell you your fortune for the day. All the girls had Magic Diaries. 


I did not have a Magic Diary.


I begged and pleaded and stomped my feet, but since I could only do this properly every other weekend, it didn't get me very far. Mum left for work really early, so I only saw her for like 2 minutes on weekday mornings. She usually went out drinking with friends or out with her boyfriend after work, so she didn't come home on weeknights until after I had gone to bed. 


(This is why I had a Jamaican accent [from my nanny] until I was five.)


Dad didn't get me things because he didn't believe in spoiling his children (which I agree with now), so I never bothered begging him for a Magic Diary on his weekends. He kept me pretty busy doing fun things, too. The Magic Diary wouldn't cross my mind until Monday, when I went back to school and all the other girls were playing with their diaries under their desks. 


And then at long last, Mum got me my very own Magic Diary. (I still have it somewhere in the depths of my closet.) I played with that thing all weekend. I put all my friends into my address book. I delighted in the fact that I could write entries into my electronic diary and password protect everything. I must have changed my password 50 times. I could not wait for school on Monday, so I could show all my friends my brand new Magic Diary. 


Guess what two of the girls in my class brought in that week?
The brand new Casio Super Magic Diary. 


You could point two of the Super Diaries at each other and send messages. (That was how we texted back in 1993.) And that thing could also work as a remote control for most televisions. They even made a non-pastel one for boys. This was the hottest sh*t to ever hit Toys 'R Us. Within a week, everyone had one.


Everyone except me, who had to finally get the original Magic Diary two days before Casio released the new one. I think I gave up on the Magic Diary as a bad job and returned my focus to Mortal Kombat.


Recipe time!


This is like a pasta and sauteed vegetables dish. It came out pretty friggin delicious, considering I just made it up while I was food shopping.


You will need:
- Spaghetti squash
- broccoli
- 1 small onion
- 1 red or orange pepper
- 1 or 2 tomatoes (I just used the tinned kind)
[You can really use any vegetable you want, but I def recommend the onion, broccoli, and pepper. I also used some leftover Brussels sprouts and they tasted quite yummy.]
- garlic
- pasta sauce (I used low-fat Vodka sauce)
- butter (or use oil to make the recipe vegan)
- white cooking wine


To make it:
- Cut the squash in half and bake it in the oven at 400 degrees F for about 1 hour, or until it's tender when you poke it with a fork.


- Mince the onion really tiny (I used my slap-chop), but cut the broccoli and pepper up in big pieces. 
- In a big frying pan, heat 1 tbsp butter (70 cals for the whipped kind) and a spoonful of garlic, then add the onion and fry it until it's transparent golden. Then add 2 tbsp cooking wine (20 cals) and the broccoli and peppers. Stir it up with the onion and garlic so everything is nicely mixed, then reduce the heat and cover the pan. Stir it every few minutes. (Covering allows you to sort of steam the veggies so they're evenly cooked and you don't need to add more butter, wine, oil, etc., and so you don't need to add more calories.)


- Once the broccoli is as tender as you want it, add the tomatoes. I used the tinned ones because then I didn't have to add any more butter or oil--they could cook in their own juices. 


- When the squash is cooked, take it out of the oven and let it sit for a few minutes so you don't burn your hand when you turn it into spaghetti. Using a fork, scrape the insides out into a bowl. 


- I served the veggies, spaghetti, and vodka sauce separately so everyone could make their own plate, but you can mix them all up and serve it that was as well. The entire thing was around 800 calories, and there was  A LOT of food (so like 200 or less per serving). Here's a photo of the leftovers:
It turned out delicious. Even got the stamp of approval from Mum, which is pretty darn impressive. 

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

Barren.

So I was driving along my merry way yesterday afternoon and came to an intersection with the following signage:
It made me giggle a little. 


I've been having weird dreams with a lot of you gals in them. They're weird because I only know what a few of you look like, and I don't know what any of you sound like. In my dream, you guys walk and talk and hang out with me, but all of you sound like the voice that's in my head narrating my thoughts. And yet you each have your own personalities. It's one of the most surreal dream experiences I've had. Even some of you that I don't know what you look like, you're there in my dreams and I know who you are, I just can't explain how. 


I'm trying to get through all your blogs, but I've been so busy the past week or so, I haven't had a chance to comment on everyone's. It makes me feel like a tool. 


I think I may need to go to the lady doctor soon. Since June, I haven't gotten my period. And it's not because I'm too thin--I'm just barely underweight, and only just got down to this weight. My period stopped when I went off birth control. And NO I am not pregnant. I've taken 3 tests just to be sure. :D (I don't think any fetus could survive this environment anyway.) The thing is, I kind of like not getting my period. If I go to my lady doctor, she will no doubt work her medical magic and I will have my period again. Every month. I've been putting off the doc for quite some time. If there's something really wrong with me, I honestly don't want to know. I figure it's just my body being messed up. I used to have really friggin bad periods: vomiting, blinding back pain, crippling stomach pain, fainting spells, fevers, and even actual contractions like you get when you're giving birth. I've been prodded, probed, sonogrammed, MRI'ed, blood-tested--the works. They couldn't find anything wrong back then, so they stuck me on the pill and that made my periods soooo much better. 


But no period at all is even better than that.


Recipe later! I'm inventing a delicious all veggie dinner, so we shall see how it goes...

Saturday, November 13, 2010

The guy next door just sneezed and it was REALLY loud. Why do men have such ridiculous sneezes?

He's still going..... 5 sneezes total. 
...6
7.
8.
9.
...
I think he's done.


Last night was like the most boring night out ever.


Paul #2 (mentioned in a previous post) invited me over, using the words "party" and "beer." So I wandered on over to his place at like 9 expecting a good time. 


There were 4 of us. A few more wandered in and out throughout the night, including his friend-and-now-new-roommate who is kinda creepy and keeps trying to get my number. The drunker friend-roommate got, the more insistent he became that I hang out with him. So I crawled into a dark corner of the living around 3.30 am and passed out on the couch under 5 blankets, then booked at 7.58 this morning. 


Good times.


Back down to 97 pounds. Not only did I NOT binge last night (I suck at Fridays), I also stayed under 1000 (new weekend limit is 1200). Word. Today the limit is 1200 IF I exercise. And I might treat myself to a fluffernutter--I can make it 180 calories and still a pretty decent size. :D


Here's a cute photo of my cat:


So sugar snap peas are pretty yummy. I forgot about them until I was in A&P yesterday and grabbed a bag. Only 14 cals per 10 pea pods! I just mix 'em up with some sea salt and eat them right out of the bag.
And the A&P must have restocked its supply of Cup-a-Soup because I got a bunch of new flavours. 
Speaking of soup, here is the pumpkin soup recipe I may or may not have mentioned a while ago. It is quite possibly the easiest recipe ever. 


You will need:
- 2 cups pumpkin (the canned kind is good) (160 cals)
-1/4 tsp nutmeg
- a pinch of clove (and when I say pinch, I mean take a pinch of ground clove and then take a much smaller pinch from that)
- 3 cups broth (45 cals)
- salt and pepper
- 1 tbsp white cooking wine (10 cals)
- 1/2 cup fat free half & half (40 cals)


To make it:
If you have a blender--saute 1/3 cup of minced onions in either the cooking wine or butter, and then move on to the pumpkin. You'll need to stick the whole batch of soup in the blender at the end, BEFORE adding the half & half just so there's no lumps of onions. My blender decided to pack it in after 8 years of loyal service, so I just skipped the onions. 
Heat the cooking wine in a medium-large saucepan. If you don't have wine, you can use butter instead (like 1/2 tbsp of the whipped kind--35 cals). The wine is nice because it's lower calories and it brings out all the flavours. Once the wine is heated a bit, put the 2 cups of pumpkin into the pan and stir it constantly for about 5-10 minutes. Add the nutmeg and cloves.
After 5 or 10 minutes, add the broth and keep stirring, bringing it to a boil. Once it starts bubbling, reduce the heat to a simmer. Keep it on a simmer, stirring a lot, for another 5 or 10 minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste. Then add the half and half (to make the recipe vegan, just skip the half & half). Heat another minute or so, stirring to make sure the half & half gets blended in nicely. Then serve it. Your entire pot of soup is 255 calories without the onions (~275 with onions, and 310 if you use onions and butter instead of wine). And it's a lot of mf soup.
You'll probably need 2 cans of pumpkin and 3 cans of broth, and you'll end up with a little of each left over. I ended up having the perfect amount of both left over to make a smaller batch of the soup a few days later, which was awesome. 

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Get onto the bus that's gonna take you back to Beelzebub...

The Jehovah's Witnesses are wandering the neighborhood again. They usually come round once or twice a year, around the holidays. This is the second year in a row they've skipped my house.


(≧▽≦)


First I just want to say that I have no problem with peoples of any religion. I'm just mildly amused by people who go door to door selling or preaching stuff. And being an evil sort of person possessed of good etiquette, I cannot just tell them "no thanks," and slam the door because that's rude; and I want to play. >:D
Why these people feel the need to go door to door in a town that's 90% Jewish is beyond me. But they still come every year. Mum always hides and used to make me hide with her (being Irish Catholic, she has a natural distrust of all Protestants). I started answering the door to the J.W.'s about 10 years ago. 


In the beginning, I answered their inquiry about my faith with, "I worship Satan."


This is wrong. 


This response will leave you stuck with them for at least 20 minutes until you get so fed up of fruitlessly trying to dismiss them politely that you will just slam the door in their faces. So I switched to, "We're Catholic." The young ones will head for the hills, and as luck would have it, most of the Jehovah's Witnesses who came a calling were boys about 18-22. But the Catholic response does not work on older people, or women of any age.


So I took the next logical step. I invited them in for tea. We discussed their religion. I seemed enthusiastic. I started talking about my beliefs (a weird hybrid of Catholic, Vodou, and Enochian, with copious amounts of witchcraft). Apparently there's just something about my demeanor that sent them packing. They didn't even try to tell me the error of my ways, and they couldn't really convince me to accept Jesus Christ as my lord and savior because I already have. He just happens to be one of many. 


I stepped on the scale this morning, and it appears that I have managed to eat myself all the way back up to 99 lbs. 100 lbs seems far too huge now. That scares me a little. I did ok-ish Monday, sucky yesterday, but awesome today; so I'm hoping it all balances out by Saturday. 


I found this awesome book in the mall:
The over-spending is getting bad again. But seriously some days I just need to go SHOPPING. Mum says I need to not get into too much credit card debt. Is she kidding? I'm a bollocky American. Not get into severe debt?! WHY DON'T I GO BURN AN AMERICAN FLAG WHILE I'M AT IT. xD


Off to read some of your blogs. I'm falling behind again. Y'all blog too fast!!


<3

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

A real post, since that last one was more like a note-to-self...

My mood has much improved from yesterday. The writing is still blocked like a mofo, but that can always be improved with drugs.


I have a tooth ache.


Like OW.


:(


I also have no dental insurance, and as a result of this I have not been to the dentist since September 2008. That was the year Mum bought me a dental check-up for my birthday. ("Wow, gee whiz, THANKS A LOT MUMMY." >:0). Mum's dentist (we'll call him Dr. K) is a sadist. But he gives me a discount on his dental services, something that no other dentist will do for the likes of poor penniless me. And also, the prospect of finding another dentist creates a level of anxiety akin to how I would feel if I found out I had intestinal parasites. So I'll stick with Dr. K, even if he could use some improvements in certain areas:

- Like not cancelling my appointment at the last minute (literally - I have received calls from his office half an hour before I was scheduled to be there) so he can go play golf because it's such a nice bloody day that he feels like taking off early.
- Some people do not like dogs. Some people especially do not like very small dogs, so I would really appreciate it if he would not throw his yappy, snappy Bichon-Frise in my lap whilst my mouth is too full of dental instruments to protest. I know Dr K loves his lap dogs (God knows I've seen him carrying them around his office enough times), but I really don't want to admire them or play with them. Really.
- Novocain is a wonderful thing. It would be nice if Dr K could use it next time he plans on yanking one of my teeth out without so much as a friendly warning.
- Radiation causes leukemia. For this reason, it is probably unwise to take 6 x-rays in one visit just because he screwed up the first bunch.
- Dr K's new flat screen tv's are pretty cool, but I wish he wouldn't offer me the remote and then take it away and change the channel (to watch that agent of Satan, Rachel Ray, of all people) just because he doesn't want to watch Law & Order re-runs.
- I can not provide detailed answers about my job/mother/car problems when my mouth is full of dental tools.
- Dr K should be able to judge, from the look on my face when he hands me the bill, that I can not afford a $500 whitening treatment.
- Stop staring at my tits.

Recipe time!

I found this thing called Brussels Sprout Fricassee in New York magazine last year, and I improved it. It was tested on a 5-year-old girl and a 6-year-old boy, and both of them ate quite a bit of it. It's a nice recipe for the holidays, I think. You can't go wrong adding bacon to stuff. You can of course make it vegetarian/vegan friendly by omitting the bacon and using a non-butter spread to cook the onions. So here's my version.

You will need:
- Brussels sprouts (about 2 containers)
- Butternut squash (about 3 1/2 cups, or half of a large one)
- broth (2 cans, vegetable or chicken)
- 1/3 cup minced onion
- 1/2 tbsp butter
- salt, pepper, and pumpkin pie spice
- bacon bits (1 to 2 tbsp)
- chopped pecans (1 ounce)

To make it:
- Chop the butternut squash into little cubes, about half an inch thick.
- In a big pan, bring one can of the broth to a simmer, and add the squash cubes. Keep it covered, and stir it every few minutes. You should simmer it for about 15 minutes.
- To prep the Brussels sprouts, cut the stems off the bottom and then chop each sprout in half, longways.
- In a separate saucepan, saute the minced onion in the 1/2 tbsp of butter. Once the onion is a transparent golden colour, add the other can of broth and bring it to a simmer. Then add the sprouts. Stir it occasionally, and cook them in the broth for five minutes.

- After five minutes, add the bacon bits to the sprouts, as well as a pinch of pumpkin pie spice. Simmer for another five minutes, or until the sprouts are cooked but still crunchy.

- Once the butternut squash is tender (after the 15 mins), turn the heat up and stir it a lot to burn off some of the excess broth. 

- After the sprouts are cooked, add them to the pan with the squash.
- Stir it up for a few minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste. Once it's done, you can stir in the chopped pecans, or sprinkle them on the top when it's ready to serve.

I did mine with only one container of sprouts, 1/2 ounce of pecans, and 1 can of broth (because SOMEONE [ahemLittleSisahem] used the other one), so at the end it came to about 633 cals for the entire thing. 


Monday, November 8, 2010

Writer's Block.

Weekend recap:
- Gabriel and I are now friends on facebook.
- I went exploring in the Pine Barrens with 2 friends. It was awesome. The Sunday binge-fest, however, was not so awesome. I took a bunch of laxies and am not weighing myself until Wednesday, so then we shall see how much damage was done.
- But I did not binge on Friday or Saturday.
- I have fallen seriously behind on all your blogs, and there are simply too many for me to read every single post that I've missed. So I'll just be skimming and commenting sporadically. Sorry ladies, but until the time machine is perfected, it's the best I can do. 


Writer's block has set in again, and this time with a bloody vengeance. The ideas are there, swimming around in the back of my head, but they just won't come out where I can see them. Even going back and re-reading all the stuff I've written recently is not helping. The fact that I now have 15 novels-in-progress is probably not helping either. I am working on:
1. - Book #3 in the pirate series (middle grade fic, like one or 2 chapters away from being done and I just can't finish it)
2. - Loathing (adult fiction that won't get out of my head)
3. - The Fairy Queen (middle grade, about a bunch of wacko fairies all on a quest for the title of Fairy Queen; book 2 in a series that is slowly taking form but I made the error of starting other books in the series before I finished this one and now my head hurts)
4. - Westley & the Witches (book 3 in the ^series--about a boy whose sister is kidnapped and he accidentally summons a fairy godmother to help find her; it needs to be typed because I've written quite a lot of it and it needs serious editing)
5. - 10 Signs Your Cat's About to Vomit (adult fiction that follows the disintegration and subsequent coming together of a very dysfunctional family; it has been started and abandoned like ten times--there are bits of this book floating around all over my room, in no particular order)
6. - The Book (same situation as above; about a rare-book dealer who comes across an old book with strange magic powers--the book possesses her boyfriend and he tries to kill her, and she makes friends with demons)
7. - Anya's Aria (YA fiction; the shifting points of view are hard to write so I pretty much gave up. Plus I've gutted this book to use parts of it in other books)
8. - Angelus (also YA; I no longer know where I want the story to go)
9. - The sequel to Drive (I'm like half a sentence away from throwing [and myself] it into a fire)
10. - Sinner (YA fiction inspired by Daddy's sudden conversion to Born-Again-Christianity; it's hard not to make it cliche, so I keep abandoning it and then going back)
11. - Untitled YA project (the one I've been working on the most, following 16-yr-old foster kid Anne after her brother is put in jail for murdering a bunch of women--this one has a lot of potential I think...)
12. - The Graelking (middle grade--children inexplicably vanishing into the attic of an old creepy house)
13. - The Watchtower (idk if this is YA or middle grade... a girl's twin sister goes missing, and then 3 days later no one remembers the twin and it's like she never existed, so the girl goes on a quest to find her)
14. - Red Queen (YA fantasy? It's a spin-off from the pirate series...)
15. - Untitled Middle Grade Fiction (about a 10-yr-old girl who makes friends with the weird ladies living next door. Coming of age story?)


There's too much noise in my head. Suggestions/ideas/critiques/etc would be greatly appreciated. :D

Friday, November 5, 2010

Do you know what "nemesis" means?

I'm not sure if I believe in soul mates. No one has proven to me that it is impossible, therefore it IS possible that each person has one soul mate wandering the planet, and that Fate might one day bring them together. With 6 billion+ people on the planet, the odds are pretty good that there's at least one person out there who is perfect for you.


But if you have a soul mate, then odds are you also have the opposite: an Arch Nemesis. Someone who is perfect for you in that you would have a completely irrational, unconditional hatred of each other. You would want to spend the rest of your life with your soul mate, and you would thus want to devote your life to destroying your nemesis. 


When I was eight or nine years old, Mum made a new friend at work. New Friend happened to be the single parent of a boy my age, named Gabriel. Obviously, it made sense for Mum and New Friend to hang out on the weekend, so they could have girl bonding time while their kids played together. 


So one Saturday, New Friend came over, and I met Gabriel. 
It was just one of those things, at least at first--two nine-year-olds meet for the first time and size each other up. And within 2.8 seconds we decided that we did not like each other. 




10 minutes later:
There aren't words for the hatred that I felt. I think the first fight started because we were playing Wolfenstein on the computer Mum stole from her office (Windows 3.0!!!). I did not agree with Gabriel's game tactics. One shove led to us on the floor kicking, screaming, punching, biting, and basically behaving like rabid hyenas until Mum and New Friend came running and pulled us apart. 


Later, we had another epic fight over who got to eat the leftover spring roll from dinner. I pushed him down the stairs for calling me a midget sissy girl. He wailed me in the head with my remote control car for calling him stupid. I locked him in the bathroom (the scary one downstairs with the weird vent in the ceiling--the vent that screamed when you turned the light on). He pushed me into the pool and attempted to hold my head under the water. 


My memories of that first day are not as good as Mum's. She said she was scared. She had never seen children behave in that way. New Friend and Gabriel only came over a few more times after that. I guess they kept trying because they thought that if we got used to each other, we could learn to get along.


Lol.


So there was a point to all of that--Mum and I were reminiscing yesterday, which is what made me think of Gabriel. I asked her what his last name was.


I found him on Facebook.


What should I do? I've never had such a deep hatred for anyone else in my life. I don't hate him anymore, since that was like 17 years ago, but I am curious to know what he's like now. What would you gals do? I want to message him with a "do you remember me?" sort of thing, but is that creepy? Or weird? Or stalkerish? I just don't know.


Some replies to your wonderful comments:
Amy, Leto, Xo-Glass-Slippers-oXAll.That.Wander.Are.Not.Lost, and Oliviathanks for the good luck wishes on the job! 


Hi to Nessa, and other new followers!


Lol Starving Artist--my laundry used to sprawl all over the room as well. There were different piles for clean and dirty. Mum got fed up looking at it though. Can't say I blame her... :D


Not.quite.ana, is that Halloween store open all year? And yeah we have a great supermarket selection around here. There's over 20 supermarkets within 15 minutes of my house, so that probably contributes to it... 


Cinnamon Brown, I would LOVE an Ndebele doll!!


MLS, I have a hard time doing tarot readings for myself, too. I always get mostly swords, which means I overthink things. :/


Ariana, I actually do torture Mum with Satanic randomness. :D I'm surprised she hasn't had me committed and/or exorcised. I'm constantly telling her to TRUST IN SATAN!!! and whenever I use her shower I write HAIL SATAN on the mirror when it's all steamed up. And of course I don't mind you copying my decor--I'm flattered!


bonesarepure, what are the other vitamin water zero flavours like? I love the go-go one, but the only other one I tried was like the grape one and it tasted like cough medicine, so I'm scared to try any of the others...


<3 you, Mona!!!!


Madison, that stinks about not finding stuff in your grocery stores. I try to find things that should be available everywhere so you guys can all find it, but it's tough. :( What country are you in? I shall try to find stuff that you can get there!


Jenn, I love those names!! Even Starhopper...


Elk, yeah I got Stelmaria from Phil Pullman's books... And I want goblin meat!!! We can get the English and Irish stuff in a nearby supermarket so imma see if they have it. If not, relatives shall have to smuggle it over with my ham, bacon, Silk Cut, tea, and Bisto.


Tracy, I actually made myself a mini fluffernutter today, only 100 calories! One slice low fat bread (45), 1/2 tbsp low fat peanut butter (45), and 1/2 tbsp Fluff (10). Yummy!!


Ophelia, thanks for the lovely comment!!


I'm going to try and go comment on some of your blogs now, girlies. Sorry if I'm missing some--I haven't had much Blogger time these last couple days, but I'm always reading your blogs on my phone! I found an app with a blog feed or something, but I can't comment from my phone. >_<


<3

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Wrap yourself around that rack of dvd's. Smoke while you are doing so...

I've been trying to get through a badly-written biography of Crazy Horse (whose name actually translated to "His-Horse-is-Spirited") and discovered that the Lakota went through life with several different names rather than just the one your parents gave you at birth. Why don't we do that? I would like to change my name to something more obnoxious. Like Stelmaria (which shall be the name of my first daughter if I am ever cursed with female children), or Clytemnestra. 


Yes, Clytemnestra has a nice ring to it. What would y'all choose if you could pick a new name?


So I'm actually getting moving with this psych project (the one on bullying, I mentioned in this post). To everyone who responded (Believe&Lose, Ariana, Eloise18, lovelybones, Jessk, Kazehana, & Oxymoron, & anyone I forgot...) I will be hunting you down to see if you're still interested. If anyone else is interested, please email me!-- bellatrixburrows@hotmail.com --and I'll send you the first questions.


I made some more progress on Peri's patch:


Now I can start the actual embroidering. Yay!!


Some treats for y'all:


I love this stuff. It tastes like a fruit roll up.


70 cals for the whole can--I put it in a salad with some crushed pecans and pico de gallo,
...which is only 5 cals per 2/3 tablespoon.


I forgot cream soda existed, but I like exploring the soda aisle for new fizzy drinks that I can have as a treat in the evenings, so I don't pig out. 0 cals. :D


Little Sis made me buy this for her. I never realized it's pretty low in calories--only 40 per 2 tablespoons. If you can stop yourself from eating the whole jar, it's a nice little treat. For me, it's just a little too sweet to have more than a spoonful. 


Sorry I've been slacking on commenting on all your blogs! I have the feeds sent to my phone, so I do read every single one, but I can't comment from my phone and I've been super busy. On the agenda for today:
- Exercise.
- Draft Mum's divorce complaint (I talked her out of paying for an attorney--she has me).
- Open a safety deposit box in my name to hide all Mum's good jewelry, because Stepbrother is a sketchy bastard who waits until there's no one home and then goes through our stuff. And this sad individual is like 38 years old. 
- Post my niece's birthday present (it's been sitting in my car for like a week).
- Start embroidering the patch.
- Read next chapter for psych.
- Hiking, if I have time?


Photo from yesterday's hike:
That's the lookout trail at Ramapo Mountain State Forest. I kicked that trail's A$$!!!